Be Curious #5 - 2 March 2025
A new month, a fresh new season...
*Exhale*
Summer in Australia is finished at last.
Some people would find that surprising, given I love the feel of warm sunshine on my skin, the normal ease of summer months and the gentle start to a new year.
Not so much in 2025.
For the second year, summer in Brisbane has been humid without being pleasant. I don’t think I have been to the beach once, when it used to be my happy place. The start of 2025 has felt laboured and slow, as though the end of 2024 was itself years ago. So I am pleased the calendar has kicked into March, where the air starts to thin out a little, the leave start to change into glorious colour and, for us, a new start beckons.
We are currently in the process of preparing our home for sale and moving back to where it all began for us, in Canberra. My partner’s job is taking us there but I am very willingly relocating - it’s a city I’ve always had strong affinity for and it is closer to home (Melbourne) or the Emerald City (Sydney) without being too close.
I hope to be there before to cold Canberra winter sets in, as in autumn, Canberra is one of the prettiest cities I’ve seen. The colours are brights and stark and numerous. They fill the soul before those cold days take hold.
After a difficult 2024 (actually there was a lot in 2023 too), I am excited by the fresh start, but the burn out I am continuing to work through also renders me anxious.
What if I don’t find a job I love?
What if I don’t find a job I can tolerate?
What do I even want to be doing, anyway?
The answer is, it doesn’t matter.
While I have been stripping life back to the barest simplicities, I am also seeking to take up more of what brings joy, solace, comfort and excitement.
So it might mean that I start the new chapter of life, in Canberra, more focussed on my own projects and less gainfully employed. That both terrifies me and enthuses me.
I do have an interview this week for a role I have done before which I enjoyed and which I think I was good at, noting there’s always a LOT to learn. I had two rejections last week - on the same day - which kicked my (admittedly limited) self-confidence in the pants; both were jobs I would have liked and I think been well suited to.
As some of you know, before I took the pathway to law, I was a creative soul. I hold a degree in Visual Art and Design, I wrote three books about art and I travelled the world teaching courses. For a brief moment, in a niche corner of the arty-crafty world, I was someone who people wanted to know and learn from. All these years later, it still baffles me and feels surreal.
That specific iteration of my creativity is in the past now, but that doesn’t mean I am not drawn to creative activities. I consider reading a creative habit. Reading good books inspires me in many ways, not least to get back to writing myself. I always thought writing was one of my superpowers, but I have never taken significant time to pursue it. I’ve started some things but haven’t stuck with them, and the fire for them is no longer there.
But new ideas are sprouting, and there is one……one……which is lingering in my thoughts. I am not sure what to make of it yet, other than my gut instinct (and the sound of in my ear saying “stop talking and start writing”) telling me that it’s a story that is worth telling.
I am also trying to create space for writing every day, leaning into a Daily Page (sorry Julia Cameron but mornings and I are just not creative partners - my writing comes after coffee) or - on a good day - pages and also using the back side of those pages for art journaling (very basic, just pictures to spark something for sparkles sake). I’m trying to do it each day, but I am not too hard on myself if I don’t. This is all supposed to be a no stress exercise.
I am also embracing learning, by signing up for Marie Forleo’s B-School. I don’t know what being self employed could look like just yet, what I’d be doing or whether it’s something I truly want. But the timing seemed right to find out if I have something to offer that people want. Who’s to say?
One thing I do know is that I would rather find out than wonder “what if?”
So, moving interstate, still working (although I have resigned from my job here in Brisbane and I am so grateful for my almost two years there - but it is time), reading, writing, learning…relaxing, right?
What I am reading:
Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert - this is a re-read as I read (well, listened) to this upon release in 2015 and it felt like a good opportunity to reconnect with the sage, unfiltered advice of one of the best.
Taft by Ann Patchett - I’ve barely started but will get back to it shortly as it’s now well estsblished that I’ll read anything Ann Patchett writes, including a shopping list.
What I am watching:
Still not the news, but I did see the Oval Office press conference where the current U.S. leaders tried to belittle and bully the President of Ukraine. I was flabbergasted. Most Americans I know did not vote for this administration and are as horrified as the rest of the world. But the vast majority of America who did vote, did vote for this, and I truly wonder if they understand what they were doing. The empath in me feels despair for the millions of wonderful Americans now in the hands of these despots. The cynic in me feels like they got what they voted for and when you run to the bottom, you find out how far down people will go. My overwhelming concern is “how does America survive this?”
Looking forward this week to the return of Grey’s Anatomy. Yes, it’s still on. Yes, I still love it. No, I am not over McDreamy yet, either.
Stay safe and keep smiling - until next time.
Love,
